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Thursday, June 13, 2002 ( 2:33 PM ) Lu Vorhies Last week my boyfriend (Marc) and I went to Los Angeles to attend a wedding. The groom is Marc's cousin. This means that all of this concerns Marc's family. I have to tread very lightly here. As anyone who has ever done Couples Therapy knows -- don't dis the family of the significant other, it will only end up back on your own face as scrambled eggs. So, I am not dissing, I am only reporting and asking a question. Okay? Are we all on the same page here? Okay. The night before the wedding there was a big party with all the family members of both the bride and groom. There must have been 975 people there. (I exaggerate only a little). I met the bride and her mother. And then I met the groom and all the rest of the 972 people who were related to the groom and to Marc. Nobody was wearing a name tag. Keeping up with the names and the various relationships was hopeless, but I kept asking anyway. Marc got annoyed, so I turned to his brother's significant other who was tickled to death to tell me all the gossip in the family. Everybody was dressed up and smiling and saying nice, inane things to each other. It was a lovely affair. The next day we ate lunch with a smaller group of family members. By then I had learned about two names and where they fit into the family tree. Saturday night was the wedding. Everybody was very dressed up. Everybody was smiling and taking pictures and posing for pictures and catching up with each other. The smiles were enormous. We were dancing and eating and laughing. What a party! Marc and I were standing by the dance floor when two of the relatives started yelling at each other. Then a third, very large relative literally picked up one of the women and took her outside. She was complaining loudly about this, as I guess anyone would. Clearly, she had not finished yelling at the other relative. About 30 minutes later the two were at it again, only not as loudly, and the third relative did not interfere. Now, here is my question. I am a licensed therapist. Should I have whipped out my license and gone over to offer my services? I am not licensed in California, but I'm sure I could have beat that charge in court. And because neither of these people is related to me, I would not have been violating any ethical standards. I wasn't sure of their names or from which branch of the tree they originated. If one of them had fainted, surely there would have been a call for a "Doctor in the house." Right? Well, could the same be true for a "Therapist in the house?" I could have taken the two women to a private room and ironed the whole thing out right then and there. It might have taken an hour or so, but what the heck, I could miss an hour of dancing, eating and laughing. I asked Marc if I should go over and offer my services. He shook his head and took me out to the dance floor so he couldn't hear what I was saying. The next morning we were an hour late to a brunch given by one of the fighters from the previous night. As it turns out, Marc is as nosy as I am. He was dying to know what was going on. If he was in conversation with any of the family members for more than 30 seconds, he asked if they knew what had happened. He would have made a good therapist. He wants to know all the details and also knows when to keep his mouth shut. It took us two more days to get to the bottom of it. As it turns out, these two have been fighting with each other for over 30 years. I bet they have never gone in for therapy together. I think I should have offered my services -- free, of course. But then again, the fight gave all of us something to talk about for the next two days. There is definitely something to that. We all need something to talk about -- why not each other? Lu # Monday, May 20, 2002 ( 8:04 AM ) Lu Vorhies May 20, 2002 - 10:00AM I have learned something new in the last 24 hours. This is not unusual, I regularly learn new things in 24 hours -- like where I last put my keys. But this is a fun thing. My new and current "boyfriend" (what a dumb title for a man who is over 40) is a computer geek. Yesterday he asked me to look at something on his computer. This also is not an unusual occurrence -- he thinks everything on his computer is equally as fascinating to me as it is to him -- bless his little geeky heart. Anyway, he asks me if I know what a Blog is. I don't. He shakes his head in utter disbelief that anyone with as much education as I have could be so stupid. He tells me. Then today, as I am trying desperately to save my business, he sends me a blog he has found and from there I decide to start my own blog on my website. Here is some info I copied from Blog.com. What is Blogger? What is a weblog/blog? Blogs posts are like instant messages to the web. So, that is what this is. Impulsivity is one of my best and worst traits. This was done impulsively and with no one's permission. I have now spent 15 minutes doing this and could probably have put that 15 minutes to better use on my business, but I think I like this as a way to let anyone learn something from me. It is what I do best. Lu # |
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